Author’s practical guidance
How much sleep is actually enough
Source named in the book: sleep duration recommendations (AAP)
The consensus figures the AAP supports are wide on purpose: eleven to fourteen hours across the day for two-year-olds, ten to thirteen for three- to five-year-olds, naps included.
Say this now
“You woke up by yourself. That means your body had enough.”
Teaches them the test you are using, in one sentence.
“We're going to try a later bedtime for two weeks.”
Names the change and its length, so nobody judges it on night one.
Do this
- Count the whole twenty-four hours for seven days before changing anything.
- Use the three signs, not the number: wakes on their own, holds the afternoon, no car sleep.
- Adjust the schedule in ten-minute steps, never in an hour.
- Keep the wake-up time fixed while you move the other end.
- Write it down — a week on paper beats an impression every time.
Avoid this
- Adding sleep to reach a number from an article — more time in bed than they need produces early waking.
- Comparing with a cousin the same age — the range between two ordinary children is about three hours.
- Counting time in bed as sleep — the gap between them is where most of the problem sits.
If it repeats
If they are inside the range, wake on their own and still fall apart every afternoon, the problem is the quality of the night rather than its length. Snoring, restless legs or a room that wakes them at four all produce enough hours and not enough sleep.
Why the book suggests this
The consensus figures the AAP supports are wide on purpose: eleven to fourteen hours across the day for two-year-olds, ten to thirteen for three- to five-year-olds, naps included. Three hours of range is not vagueness: it is the spread between children.
Which means the number is not the test. A child at the bottom of the range who wakes on their own, holds up through the afternoon and stays awake in the car is getting enough. A child at the top who has to be woken every morning is not.
From this collection
Same Words: Every Night
45 prepared situations in this family area.