Author’s practical guidance
Water: the pool, the bath, the shallow end of everything
Source named in the book: AAP guidance on injury prevention
A three-year-old at the edge of water cannot assess it.
Say this now
“Water is only with a grown-up. Every time, every kind of water.”
One rule for pools, tubs, ponds and kiddie pools.
“Ask me first, and wait for me to say yes.”
The waiting is what fails. Name it in the rule.
Do this
- Stay within arm's reach whenever they are in water, including the bath.
- Name a watcher out loud at gatherings and hand the job over explicitly when you leave.
- Put the phone away. Supervision that is nearly happening is not happening.
- Empty tubs, buckets and kiddie pools the moment they are finished with.
- Book swimming lessons as a layer, not the answer.
Avoid this
- "Stay where I can see you." Seeing is not reaching, and reaching is what matters.
- Arm bands instead of an adult — they change the water, not the supervision.
- Assuming somebody else is watching at a party. Usually nobody is.
If it repeats
If your child heads for water the second your back is turned, treat it as a fencing and latching problem rather than an obedience one. Nobody has ever regretted a locked gate.
Why the book suggests this
A three-year-old at the edge of water cannot assess it. There is no working sense of depth, no read on their own tiredness, and no alarm that fires before they are already in trouble. It is also quieter than people expect — rarely the noise films have promised.
Pediatric guidance is unromantic about what follows. An adult within arm's reach, watching, not reading. Rules the child keeps are a second layer and a thin one — at this age the protection is an adult's position, not the child's judgment.
From this collection
Same Words: Their Own Body
45 prepared situations in this family area.